Deceivers – The Toxic Quadrant

If you recall, very early on, we presented a framework for the On The Ball Theory that included a two-by-two matrix, and corresponding four quadrants, which concluded with people falling into one of these four groups:

You’ll remember we went on to define the quadrants respectively as Achievers (1), Believers (2), Student Achievers (3), and Receivers (4).

A fifth group, Conceivers, was later introduced, which are actually a subset of Achievers, and not only are On The Ball, but have found ways to redefine what it means to be On The Ball for the rest of us. They can rethink existing challenges and establish new standards or improved solutions to problems for all of us.

Now we’re going to turn the framework inside out. As much as one would like to think that everyone fits within one of these four to five groups, there are in fact outliers.

There’s a hidden quadrant of toxic individuals called Deceivers – they think they are on the ball, but are not at all. Deceivers come in a variety of shapes and sizes, and we’ve all experienced them in all walks of life. Sometimes it’s a result of them operating in a vacuum, and a degree of ignorance, other times there is absolute motivation behind their actions, and they are out take advantage of, or do harm to others.

And this is not an issue of Ball Awareness or Ball Definition – these individuals are typically alert enough to know the Ball exists, and we are all entitled to our own definitions of the Ball. This, however, is a fundamental, objective review of the 8 Traits, and deficiencies in some or all of those Traits, that prevent them from actually being On The Ball.

Some of you may be familiar with the Dunning-Kruger Effect, which describes a cognitive bias where people with limited knowledge or competence in a domain overestimate their own ability. Conversely, individuals with higher competence often underestimate their relative standing. This phenomenon, first documented by David Dunning and Justin Kruger in 1999, has profound implications across many aspects of professional and personal life — particularly in areas like integrity, learning, communication, collaboration, and leadership.

Additionally, you may also be familiar with the term gaslighting, which is commonly defined as a psychological manipulation technique in which one person (the Deceiver in our case) tries to convince others that their reality is untrue. It is a tactic often used by narcissists to gain control of their intended target. Gaslighting tries to create confusion and humiliation in the minds of others. The person performing the gaslighting is attempting to confuse others into questioning their own value system and beliefs.

By comparison, we’re not sure that the Peter Principle applies here as a rule. If you haven’t heard that term before, it is a concept developed by Laurence J. Peter back in 1969 which observed that people in a hierarchy (typically business) tend to be promoted and rise to “a level of respective incompetence” based on their success in previous jobs. If that employee is On The Ball, it’s possible that they have some short-term challenges (employee to manager), need to learn new skills, and eventually get back on their new Ball. We discussed the evolution of “The Ball”, and how it is Elastic, early on in the framework of the theory.

As a result, whether these individuals are unintentionally Deceivers and fall into the Dunning-Kruger Effect group, or attempting to do harm as Deceivers by gaslighting others, both will show issues and limitations with many of the 8 Traits.

Integrity

We referred to Integrity as the Foundation Trait, and in an earlier post, stated, “Integrity is the foundation of everything successful. But if you don’t have integrity, nothing else matters.” We also used a broad brush to include the following:

• Establishing trust with others

• Holding yourself accountable for your actions, to yourself and others

• Being a reliable resource to those around you

• Acting in an ethical manner

• Accepting responsibility

We concluded that Integrity is the hardest of the traits to maintain, and easiest to break. It is also the first building block of all other traits needed to be On The Ball.

By comparison, Deceivers who lack Integrity, cannot, by definition, be On The Ball.

• They cannot be trusted, as they say one thing, and do another, repeatedly

• There is no accountability for their actions – they will not accept blame for things they did wrong, and perhaps claim credit for things that others accomplished

• They make bold claims, promises, or decisions without realizing the complexity or consequences involved, and are unwilling to accept responsibility for those consequences.

Accepting responsibility for something that didn’t work out would also include admitting limitations in knowledge and/or skill set. Deceivers are unable or unwilling to do this, often thinking their actions are beyond reproach. Additionally, it is not uncommon for Deceivers to deflect and never be held accountable for anything – it always must be someone else’s fault, and they are happy to tell you why.

When this happens, when your actions do not back up your words, your trust begins to erode, and further damage your credibility and integrity. You are viewed by others as unreliable, even if you are in a position of authority. If you don’t want to be a Deceiver, you have to act with Integrity.

Curiosity

Steve Jobs is known for the comment “It doesn't make sense to hire smart people and then tell them what to do. We hire smart people so they can tell us what to do.” Many CEOs will tell you the exact same thing, because while we are curious and continue to learn throughout our lives, we cannot possibly be experts in everything.

Deceivers, by comparison, will claim they are an authority on all subjects, and perhaps to know more about a given topic than anyone else they know. Confidence born from ignorance can make individuals less receptive to new information, feedback, or alternative viewpoints. Instead of seeking growth, they may double down on their incorrect understandings, assuming they already know enough. This hampers intellectual and professional development, creating stagnant organizations and individuals. True learning demands an acknowledgment of curiosity — a stance that Dunning and Kruger’s findings in particular suggest many are reluctant to adopt naturally.

Communication

Deceivers will also be challenged with their communication skills, both their expression and their listening. Those that fall victim to the Dunning-Kruger Effect may express themselves with unjustified certainty, toning down, or even muting, more nuanced or expert perspectives. Overconfidence can lead to oversimplification of complex issues, misunderstanding of context, and the spread of misinformation. In situations and settings that reward assertiveness over accuracy in the information shared, this dynamic can be especially damaging, making it hard for genuine experts or alternative points of view to engage in conversation.

As shared in a previous post, Roy T. Bennett is attributed with the following quote: “Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply. When we listen with curiosity, we don’t listen with the intent to reply. We listen for what’s behind the words.” This is a fundamental flaw with Deceivers – since they typically are not curious, and believe they know everything, they don’t listen to understand, and it further compromises dialogue.

Collaboration

Collaboration – the art of working effectively with others – is a strained trait for Deceivers. Successful collaboration thrives on trust, mutual respect, and the ability to exchange diverse points of view. If Deceivers are already challenged in the Integrity department with a lack of trust and respect with others, as well as handicapped with their communication skills, if they are unwilling or unable to engage in productive dialogue, then collaboration will suffer tremendously.

In group settings, Deceivers will dominate discussions and sideline more competent peers, leading to sub optimal outcomes and a lack of innovation. Team members will feel undervalued, and friction inevitably arises. Teams burdened with Deceivers, specifically those with Dunning-Kruger attributes, often find that collaboration devolves into competition or stagnation.

Previously, we discussed how “Two Heads Are Better Than One” when it comes to Collaboration. The spirit of that focuses on the fact that in solving problems, if you introduce a different perspective to your problem solving approach, and have more options to choose from, you increase your chances for success. Deceivers are likely to surround themselves with people that will simply agree with them, and just say “yes” for fear of being shown the door.

Leadership

The final trait we’ll address, and perhaps nowhere is the Dunning-Kruger Effect more dangerous, than in Leadership. Deceivers who lack the necessary insight, but overestimate their abilities, can lead organizations into serious trouble. Bad decisions, strategic missteps, and harmful, divisive cultures, often follow.

Good leadership requires not only decisiveness, but also the capacity for reflection and learn more (curiosity), the humility to seek counsel (collaboration), and the wisdom to recognize one’s own blind spots (integrity). Without these interwoven traits, leadership become performative rather than transformative, maybe even only managerial, and the Deceiver ends up maintaining an illusion of competence instead of fostering genuine organizational health.

Can Deceivers Ever Be On The Ball?

Never say never, but it would be a long and difficult journey. Think through the challenges they would need to overcome:

• First and foremost is Integrity – to get On The Ball, this foundational trait has to be in place. Trust with others has to be established, they have to be accountable for their actions, act in an ethical and moral manner.

• If they are curious, and willing to learn, then that’s a tremendous next step.

• Eventually, a path to being successful requires effective communication and collaboration, where the individual can be relied upon and values the input of others.

• If this person were to rise to a leadership role, they would leverage the positive traits they have built upon, and do so with empathy towards others.

In the end, we likely cannot avoid the Deceivers in our lives, but we can look to minimize the impact they have on us. We also are not likely to help Deceivers in a way that we can help Receivers get On The Ball, but if they start the journey themselves, perhaps their curiosity will guide them along the way.